Some nights, I stay up later than I should—not because I’m not tired, but because I know what’s waiting for me in the morning.
The alarm. The rush. The job I’m not exactly thrilled to go to.
So instead of going to bed early, I stretch the night out a little longer. I might scroll through something funny, work on a hobby, or just sit in the quiet and be.
It’s my time. The only time that really feels like mine.
This isn’t about not being able to sleep. It’s a choice—a quiet rebellion against a day that didn’t leave room for me.
It even has a name: revenge bedtime procrastination.
this is about the intentional loss of sleep, an entirely different animal than what you typically think of among the common causes of sleep deprivation.
It’s something a lot of us do when the rest of the day feels out of our control. We may not even realize we’re making a choice—we just act out of a feeling of need. We push back bedtime just to reclaim a few precious moments of joy or freedom.
Sometimes it’s about stress.
Sometimes it’s boredom, or wanting to escape.
Sometimes we just need to feel like ourselves again before the cycle starts over.
Why Do We Stay Up?
Here are just a few reasons:
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To get a moment of peace after the kids are asleep.
That sliver of quiet time can feel sacred—just you, your thoughts, and maybe a snack no one else gets to touch. -
To delay the next day.
When tomorrow feels heavy, it’s tempting to hold onto the present just a bit longer. -
To escape from stress or anxiety.
Sometimes, sleep feels like surrender—and we’re not ready for that yet. -
To squeeze in something we love.
A book, a hobby, a favorite show—anything that reminds us of who we are outside of obligations. - To chase productivity. Some people stay up late checking off one more task, believing they’ll catch up tomorrow — but if you’re struggling to make time for sleep, it might be time to rethink the trade-off.
- To capture inspiration. I often wake in the middle of the night. Ideas, songs, or new projects tend to arrive unannounced—and walking into the studio to write them down can feel more vital than sleep itself.
Even when we know we’ll pay for it in the morning, we do it anyway.
Because those late-night hours feel like ours.
And when the rest of the day belongs to everyone else, that matters.
Can We Catch Up?
While we can’t fully “catch up” on sleep like a bank account, we can care for ourselves in ways that soften the impact:
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Take short naps when you can.
Even 20 minutes can help improve focus and mood. -
Let yourself sleep in a little on your days off—but not too much.
Oversleeping can throw off your rhythm. -
Give yourself screen-free wind-down time.
A gentle transition can help you fall asleep faster when you’re ready. -
Be kind to yourself the next day.
No guilt. Just grace, coffee (if you like it), and deep breaths. -
Plan a “sleep date” with yourself.
About once a month, I give myself permission to pause everything. I pick a weekend to rest, slow down, and make sleep the priority. It doesn’t solve the reasons I stay up too late—but it does help me short term. Physically and mentally, I feel clearer, calmer, and more able to carry on again for a while.
We don’t always have the luxury of perfect routines.
But we do have choices—little ones.
The kind that say: you matter, too.
If you’ve been staying up just to feel like yourself again—you’re not alone.
I see you.
And I hope tonight brings you not just peace, but rest you don’t have to earn.
Sleep well,
Goodnight.
